How to catch pirates
by RSTUV
Summary: The adventures of Loguetown
1. Chapter 1

I leaned back at my chair and sighed, releasing another cloud of smoke. Sitting forward I reached to place the last rock on the rock tower. _The new wanted posters should be getting in just about._

"Captain Smoker! There is an alert." Mart burst in from the outer office and stood at attention.

"We have received notification from Marine Headquarters, that Monkey D. Luffy and his band of pirates are headed towards Loguetown!" _Who the hell is Monkey D. Luffy, am I supposed to have heard of him?_ I thought sarcastically.

"He's the East Blue pirate with a reward on his head of 30,000,000 Beli" Mart announced.

"30 million huh?" I murmured to myself. _It has been a long time since we'd had someone of that caliber here. This might actually be fun. It will be good to be up against a real challenge. But still nothing to worry about. Hmmmm Monkey D. Luffy why does that name sound so familiar._

"Want me to congratulate him or something?" I grunted, trying to get Mart to relax, but Mart persisted

"He is the one who defeated Don Krieg and Merman Arlong." He continued working himself up into a fever. _He always does this._

"Shut the hell up" I growled. Mart broke off. The I groaned and got to my feet making the marine shuffle nervously

"Damn your yelling. You broke it" I told him.

He apologized at once.

"I am sorry."

"Well forget it." I sighed looking at his stricken face. _Ah shit!_ I then reminded him

"I have my own way of doing things, I work at my own pace you know?"

"Yes" He said, slightly more relaxed. I walked to the window and threw it open before turning back and addressing the soldier. _Now that he is calmer I need so more information._

"You were saying." I prompted.

"It seems there are a band of pirates heading for the city today. " He reported.

"What are you getting all worked up for? Since I have been at this post has there ever been a pirate that's been able to get out of this city once they've entered it?" I asked, walking over to my desk, where my jacket was heaped. Putting it on I heard the soldier's quietly utter,

"Well no…"

"Then don't get all nervous. I'll take care of it in my own pace" I told him, putting my arm into the other sleeve, and jerking the jacket onto my shoulders. At that moment Tom ran in

"Reporting sir" he saluted, then continued, "pirates have been sighted in the harbor. Please come to confirm the situation." _So it has begun!_ I thought eagerly.

"Its gotta be the Luffy pirates sir" worried Mart. "There weren't any others mentioned in the bulletin."

"30 million huh. "I murmured to myself, ignoring Mart., "That's something I'd like to see"

"Huh" asked Tom, bewildered.

"Nothing just thinking out loud, forget it." I walked past them, out through door. Tom followed right behind. Mart yelled after me

"Don't you need this?" I heard the rustling of paper He must be talking about the wanted poster. _Nope pirates are easy to find._ Tom followed after me

"Sir please request back up."

"Don't need it." I told him firmly.

"But the supposed strength of the enemy." Tom pressed. I stopped and looked over my shoulder at him

"Shut the hell up." _I can't have my soldiers doubting my abilities._ "Don't tell me what to do." I ordered, glaring at him. _Don't ruin this for me. I have been waiting for a challenge ever since I was stationed here._ Tom immediately leapt to attention.

"I am sorry Captain"

"Whatever. Where is Tashigi?" _I don't recall seeing her at all today._ Relaxing slightly the Tom replied,

"She has been out all morning. She even missed morning drills." _Damn it Tashigi._

"That ditzy girl. Where did she go off to now? " I asked no one in particular. It was then that something cold hit my leg and I heard the cry of a child. Turning back around and looking down. I saw the child in question starring up at me, a look of deep sadness and disappointment on her face.

"Ice cream… " She began. I crouched in front of her and plucked a coin from my pocket. _This should be enough_.

"Sorry kid" I said, patting her head "Looks like my pants ate your ice cream. Here go buy yourself five scoops." Her face lite up and she smiled wide.

"Lets go," I told Tom.

"Thank you" said the girl. I waved back.

When we got to the docks I immediately recognized the pirates, to be the scruffy looking people surrounding their captain, a man in a brown coat and hat with a curly mustache who was laughing. _They could not be more obvious_. The captain was shouting about cleaning the harbor out.

"Oi" I shouted, interrupting his speech. The pirates stopped cheering and looked at me. I could see their eyes flash to my uniform and to my sea stone staff.

"Are you the boss?" I directed the question at the curly mustached pirate. I already knew the answer but wanted to be sure. And maybe they would give me information on him.

"Who the hell are you?!" demanded curly mustache.

"You the bastard named Monkey D. Luffy?" I asked curly mustache. I knew what the response would be even before he could reply. _There is no way this guy is worth 30 million._

"Well let's see how tough you are since your stupid enough to show your ugly face in my town." I challenged.

"What you have got to be kidding me," screeched curly mustache.

"Get him lads" I let my body turn to smoke and engulf the pirate crew. Wrapping around them all before tightening and pinning their arms to their sides. Grabbing some rope from the warehouse, I tied them all together. It was over before it had even begun. Even as Tom looked on in satisfaction I was grinding my teeth. _Where are you Monkey D. Luffy?_

"A job well done Captain." Tom congratulated me; "You finished off the Luffy pirates in record time."

"Are you blind or just stupid?" I demanded, my frustration rising "How could any of these pirates be Luffy? If these pansies are worth 30 million. Then it is the end of the world."

"Then what about Luffy?" Quavered Tom.

 _He is here somewhere. I can feel it._

"He will show himself soon enough." _They always do._ I reminded myself. "And then the fun will start." I looked out across the harbor as if 30 million Beli captain would appear when his name was called.

"Huh?" came confused squally voice in front of me. I looked down to find a boy in a red vest, jean shorts, and straw hat squatting a few feet ahead of me. His hand was raised to his forehead as he squinted around.

"How did I end up at the harbor again." The kid wondered out loud. When he spotted us he brightened and, throwing his hands in the air, shouted

"OOIIIII!" _How did he not get caught up in the fight that just occurred?_ I wondered to myself. I turned to Tom and asked

"Is that another one of the idiots?" I asked gesturing to the pirates tied up behind me. _Although I seriously doubt it. He appears to be a stupid kid._

"I don't think so," replied Tom sounded as though he thought this guy was too stupid to be a pirate. The boy had reached us now,

"What luck! Can you tell me how to get to the execution platform?" He asked with a big smile. Excitement was leaking from him faster then smoke from a chimney. It was then that I saw a tiny scar under his left eye. _I don't think I remember seeing this kid before._ _I don't recall any brats with scars under their eyes. No way that this kid is a pirate though either. Why would anyone let alone a pirate want to go to the execution platform? So then who is he?_ I wondered

"Execution platform?" I asked

He turned, scratching his head and looked round the docks again.

"Yeah. I think I am lost." He admitted, his voice losing some of its shine.

"I have not seen you around before." He looked up at me his voice instantly brightening.

"Yeah I just got in today." He grinned. He put his hands on his hips exclaimed. "Man what a big city! It's totally different from Fuusha Village." _So he is a villager I have heard of Fuusha Village small down on the edge of no where._

"Why are you looking for the gallows?" I asked still not quite satisfied with the village boy story.

"I want to see it." I caught a glimpse of his eyes from under his hat. They were alive with excitement and determination. I had never seen anyone look like that before.

"I want to see the place where the pirate king died."

My cigars almost fell out of my mouth as I gaped at him, stunned. The kid had had enough of my silence and looked around me.

"You don't know then." He asked before turning and walking off

"Wait." He turned around. "Follow the smoke." I said using my power to direct the smoke up the alley behind me that I knew led straight to Main Street that ran all the way up to the platform.

"Ooh" He squealed, his voice cracking in excitement

"Over there" And in a flash he was off his flip-flops clacking on the pier.

"Thanks." he yelled over his shoulder. I turned to watch him. _What a strange kid._ I soon put the kid from my mind as I spent the rest of the day patrolling around town looking for any signs that pirates were there. _Luffy would be smart. He would find ways to hide._ I reasoned. I looked for unfamiliar faces. _They might have a lot of gold._ I realized. So I asked shopkeepers about high payers. _Probably would want to buy weapons before going off to the Grand Line._ I asked around the blacksmiths and weapons shops. Although I did find out from Ippon-Matsu that Pirate Hunter Roranoa Zoro and Tashigi had been in his nobody had noticed anything suspicious. The day turned up nothing. _They probably had not arrived yet._ I decided. Calling it a day, I wandered down to the Gold Roger bar. _Time to get a drink and relax after a long frustrating day._ Pushing aside the skull and crossbones curtain I stepped into the dimly lit entry hall. The old man glared at me as I pushed through the wooden doors that separated the hall from the bar.

"So its you huh?" He sniffed.

"The usual greeting, eh? Not a nice way to treat an old customer" _His only customer more like_. I smiled, appreciated the break from the "Captain this" and "Captain that"

"You ruined my business," He snapped. "I don't feel like joking around with you."

"Don't think of me as some one who betrayed you. It is not my fault this is the business you choose. The pirates today are all weaklings. That is the real problem" I told the old man's back as he walked to the kitchen and clanged around some pots and pans. It was then that I noticed to glasses down the bar.

"A customer huh? " _Monkey D Luffy_. I immediately thought. _Citizens did not venture to this bar. Only a pirate would come in here._ This was the first evidence I had that Luffy was here. _Today wasn't a complete bust. At least I knew there was another pirate here aside from the imbeciles I had caught at the harbor._

"That is pretty unusual" I grinned. _Finally_. _The chase is on. Looks like Luffy or who ever this one is knows how to evade notice.  
_

"I'd like some rum." I told the old man's back.

"We don't serve your kind here." He grouched back, still washing dishes. I laughed,

"That's discrimination you know. Today is a special day. Isn't it?" I smiled grabbing a bottle of rum from the bar with my smoke. I heard the old man stop washing dishes. I popped the cork on the bottle and chugged the fiery liquid.

"Ahhh That's the stuff." I swiveled on my stool and stared down and the purple leather stool next to me.

"What happened that day is still clear in my mind. Roger in his last moments. It was muggy and hot just like today." I murmured, losing myself in the memory. _I had been running late and was sweating from running in the heat but I what to see him. I finally got to Main Street and pushed my way through the sweaty bodies to the front. And when I got to the front I gasped. He towered over his captors. Even in chains he carried himself with pride. I grinned and the pirate kind turned his head toward me and smiled, victoriously. As if he was not being taken to his death. He did not look defeated at all. I gaped, wealth, fame, power this man had it all. He was the man who had everything. And he faced his death with pride like a warrior. The crowds followed him down the street. As the pirate king climbed the stairs, I could hear him saying, "Inherited Will, The Destiny of an Age, The dreams of people. As long as people continue to pursue the meaning of freedom those things will never die." He kneeled at the top of the platform. As the marines rasied their spears I couldn't look away. A man in the crowd shouted._

 _"Oi Pirate King! What did you do with your treasure? It's somewhere on the Grand line isn't it? You have it don't you? You're ultimate treasure?"_

 _"Silence!" Shouted the marines from the platform. I leaned forward eagerly to hear the king's answer._

 _"You're special treasure? ONE PIECE!" The man in the crowd had screamed. There was a beat of silence, and then incredibly, the pirate king laughed._

 _"My treasure? " The man had asked triumphantly._

 _"Be quiet!" the soldiers carrying out the execution commanded._

 _"Go look for it. I left all of it at that place!" The Gold Roger had shouted the challenge to the crowd. The, marines raised their spears and,_

 _"EXECUTE!" The soldiers shouted and stabbed the pirate king. The crowd erupted._

The screams and chants of the crowd echo in my head even now. The pirate king's smile was burned in to my brain. _How could he be so happy at his own execution. How did the man who had everything, the freest man in the world be caught?_ To this day I still wondered. I was pulled from my memories by Mart walking into the bar with a stack of wanted posters.

"This is the new wanted listings. Post this somewhere visible." He ordered. Clearly he did not know that I would be here. When he saw me he leapt into a salute, a few of the wanted posters flying out of his hands.

"Captain Smoker!" he exclaimed. before stammering before stammering out an apology. I glanced at him and saw the name "Luffy" on a paper that was floating to the floor. _Luffy? That poster must have a picture on it._ I rose and headed over to the paper. Picking it up and flipping it over, I came face to face with the boy in a straw at. _THAT BOY!_ I realized, _The lost boy from the harbor._ _What the hell! No way! That boy if 30 million Beli? I guess that is why he wanted to see the execution platform. Did he know who I was? Was he pretending to be stupid so I wouldn't suspect? There is no way that he would risk exposure to ask a Marine where the execution platform is! Maybe he was just trying to cover up for being at the harbor. Either way I have to check the execution platform._

I was out of the bar in a flash.


	2. Chapter 2

I reached the execution platform in the center of town in no time. The stairs had been removed and the boy-captain was climbing the scaffolding. The only thing I would have to worry about was that the whole town seemed to be in the square watching. _It could get messy_ I realized _but that is a chance I will have to take_.

"Ohhhh!" The people gathered gasped as the pirate loss his grip and almost fell only to recover at the last second.

"Oi!" I called striding to the front of the crowd. Captain Strawhat didn't hear me.

"Oi boy!" I shouted, louder. That got his attention, he twisted his head around to an impossible angle, and looked down at me.

"What do you want? I am busy." He responded, clearly he did not remember meeting me at the harbor or notice that I was a marine. _Or maybe he just thinks he is to strong to concern himself_ _I'll see about that_. I thought.

"Are you the guy with the biggest bounty in East Blue?" I asked trying to get him to recall what marines might look like. _It would be best if he came quietly._

"I'm Luffy. Do you need something." He told me. _What the hell? Is there something wrong with him? Is he being cocky?_ The boy slid further down the scaffold. It appeared I would have to be straight forward with this pirate.

"I'm Captain Smoker of the Navy. I'm in charge of Loguetown." I stated, point blank. "You're under arrest." _That got his attention Now will he come quietly or make a scene?_

"Huh? Arrest? Forget it." He frowned, looking puzzled!? Then, bizarrely, he smiled and said

"I'm just about to go into the Grand Line and be King of the Pirates." He proclaimed with a grin.

 _He thinks he can be the pirate king?_ I almost laughed.

"King of the pirates" I walked forward till I was at the base of the platform.

"I refuse to get arrested in a place like this?" He exclaimed. _Is he really just dumb or is he trying to plead with me or bargain?!_ I couldn't figure him out. Then I remembered myself and that it didn't matter if I could or couldn't figure him out, I had a job to do.

"Then you will have to go through me." I challenged.

"You don't get into the Grand Line unless you can beat me." I informed him. Cracking my knuckles I could not help but feel a little excitement for the battle.

"That is the rule of this town." I stated. Now all I had to do was bait him.

"That's assuming you're brave enough to fight me." I could see that the bait was unnecessary _but it might make him angry and stupid._

"I can't get into the Grand line unless I defeat you huh?" He said smiling.

"Then I'll beat you" He stated as if it would be no trouble at all. "Go ahead and try" I laughed back.

"Gum Gum Nooo!" _He has a devil fruit_ I realized then cursed myself for not thinking of it before. It explained why he might have been able to gather such attention quickly. _But what is it._ I braced myself for anything He appeared to be about to punch me but he was a good fifty feet away. When he let his arm swing he lost balance and fell except his legs stayed wrapped around the scaffold while he fell a good ten feet. I realized his body had stretched. _He must be a Rubber man_. I realized _._ His abdomen and head swung back and forth.

"Darn it my legs are tangled." He cried. _Is he really this much of a imbecile?_ I wondered.

"What the hell are you doing?" I demanded angrily. _How is this guy worth 30 million beli?  
_

"I'm not doing this 'cause I want to' my legs are stuck" The idiot explained as though it was obvious. _Is he trying to put me off guard maybe he has a weapon hidden._ He had pulled himself together again and was pulling frantically at his legs. All of a sudden he came loose or rather fell loose and hurtled down towards me.

"I'm unstuck" he cried then immediately " Gum Gum no Pistol" his fist shot towards me. I easily dodged it and using my ability jumped quickly behind him. Catching him off guard I landed a punch to his face sending him to the ground, but before he could hit I moved again putting my anger at his patheticness into my kick I sent him flying again.

"Someone as pathetic as you worth 30 million Beli?" I shouted "I don't even need to use my devil fruit power. My fists are more then enough" As he flew toward the scaffolding he flipped in mid air so he could bounce of the poles and fly back towards me.

"Here I come." He shouted, but I easily dodged and punched him in the face sending him into the building. He bounced off a wall and landed on the execution platform. Then he bounced off that too. He hit the ground face first.  
"22 years ago when I saw his execution. His proud final moments were worthy of the Pirate King. You, king of the pirates, don't make me laugh." I knew of the powers that lay within the upper military _he doesn't stand a chance._

"You can't even enter the Grand Line." I taunted, as the straw hat captain attempted to get to his feet.

"There is no point in getting back up" I told him but he did anyway and turned back around, smiling.

"There is no way I will know that unless I try." He replied. I just stared at him, _there is definitely something wrong with him._ I concluded. The pirate crouched and cried

"Here goes. Gum gum…" He stretched his foot backwards. Too far it came around the other side of the platform and wrapped around the fountain in the middle of the square.

"Oh no!" He cried and, before I could grab him, he was flying through the air over the building tops and away.

"What is with that boy." I wondered. There was one thing I knew for sure, _he is an idiot and I there is no way that he is leaving this town._ I headed back to headquarters, when I got to my office inside the blue building, I told Tom that he should be on the look out for the straw hat pirate by the execution platform, Tom of course took it to far.

"Find Luffy! He is hiding in Loguetown somewhere." He shouted at a group of marines standing at attention in my office

"Yes Sir!" The saluted and left.

"How many times do I have to tell you not to shout?"I reminded Tom. I put my feet up on my desk and reclined back contemplating the wanted poster in front of me. _Not to mention I doubt the kid is hiding, he is too stupid, he knew I was a Marine from the start and made no attempt to hide at all._

"He won't be hiding." I told Tom.

"As long as I am around he will show up again." _We had made a deal after all._ At that moment Tashigi ran into the room, sword clutched in her arms, glasses askew.

"Captain Smoker! Did something happen?" She asked. _It is about DAMN time. Where has she been all day?_

"Tashigi, where the hell did you go?!" I demanded of my second in command, making my tone so sharp that even the Tom, behind her, gulped. _She needs to learn that running off without telling anyone is not how someone rises through the ranks in the Marines._ But before she could answer we were interrupted,

"C-Captain!" Cried two battered soldiers hobbling into my office. "Roronoa Zoro!" They cried _Oh what now! Why would a pirate hunter be here? Is he here for Luffy? Well that is just too bad. I am going to be the one to take the idiot out._

"We were attacked by pirate hunter Zoro." They gasped. _What the fuck!_ I sat up in my chair, letting my feet drop to the floor.

"Why would he attack you?" I wondered. Then I remembered hearing about the pirate hunter being taken prisoner by Captain Morgan, so maybe he wanted revenge. But from what I had heard about Roronoa Zora he did not seem like the type to blindly attack a marine base, he seemed smarter than that. _So why. Why is nothing today making sense? Luffy the idiot who some how has a bounty of 30,000, Roronoa Zoro, a pirate hunter attacking a marine base. All these problems started happening when Luffy showed up. They most all be somehow connected, but how? Luffy will show up and when he does I will get him and everything will fall into place._

"He will show up." I murmured to myself. _All I have to do is wait and hope that nothing else insane happens._ I turned to Tom and told his that he should take a some soldiers and head down to the execution platform to watch for strawhat.

"Alert me the moment he shows up." I ordered. Tom nodded and left the room. For the rest of the day I threw myself into paper work. It was late afternoon when Mart came rushing into my office. I knew by just the look on his face what he was about to say.

"He showed up?" I asked.

"Yes, they were watching the square like you told them, and straw hat finally appeared just now." He confirmed. _It is time to end this._ I rose and let my body turn to smoke, it would be faster to travel this way. _Just you wait, Brat._


End file.
